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A Saturday Soul Party
Soul party; a gathering of likeminded women talking about real shit. I had a few friends ask me what I did on Saturday. I was struggling to articulate the life and career coaching/personal development retreat I had experienced. Was it like a church retreat? They asked. Oh, a writing retreat? A women’s retreat? It wasn’t until a few days later…
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Locked and Bolted
The Vietnam War was one of the most notorious in American history and has affected the lives of countless veterans; my Uncle Bob being one of them. He is the most gentle soul I know and served honorably on the front lines in the U.S. Army during this conflict. Like many veterans of this war, coping with the emotional aftermath…
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ONE
Maisley, I remember the day you were born so vividly. I think about it all the time. I hope you don’t take the look of shock on my face when we first met as a bad thing. I was just so surprised that my body actually gave birth to you and that you were a real, live human. You didn’t…
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Waiting for Maisley
As I sit here on the eve of Maisley’s first birthday, I can’t help but think about what I was doing last year at this very minute and the days leading up to her birth; endless swells of uncertainty, joy, fear and excited anticipation. Here are some highlights from my journal entries during the last 15 days of waiting for…
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A Postpartum Identity Puzzle
I am 10 months postpartum. Although, do you even call it postpartum past three months? At this point, I’m just a straight-up mom. One of my yoga teachers told me, that someone told her, that you don’t really become a mom until the second child. That makes me feel really tired. My mind is so full all the time.…
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First Steps on Mother Turf
Maisley, You took your first steps today. We have been coaxing you to walk for a few weeks now, but you never take our bait in the form of a yellow sneetch or a sparkly blue ball. We were out in the beautiful sunshine at Choice in Carlsbad. Just you and me. It’s one of your favorite places (and mine)…
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Holy Anxiety
I wore a skort to church one Sunday when I was 9-years-old. I mistakenly sat at the end of the wooden pew which left me susceptible to outside hand holding during the “Our Father”. Sure enough, the young (cute) boy across the aisle reached out with his clammy right hand, ready for my awkward embrace. The rest of mass he…
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My Grandmas & Me
Sometimes in a tough moment, or just because, I close my eyes and talk to my angel grandparents. This week in particular, I’ve been thinking a lot about my grandmothers; Grandma Joan and Nana. When I think about these amazing women, the picture I always have in my head is of them hugging me. I can visualize their unique embrace.…
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Mother’s Day Matters
Yesterday was my very first Mother’s Day. I had been so looking forward to this celebration, yet I felt a low level sense of disappointment all day. When Maisley was two months old, I remember thinking how much I would enjoy the sh** out of Mother’s Day this year. I remember in a breaking point, thinking, this is why mothers have a whole…
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Sleep + Springtime
I miss her when she sleeps. Almost every night before I close my eyes, I lay under the covers with my iPhone in night mode and scroll through the thousands of images and videos of my happy girl. The trips we’ve taken, the simple moments at home, family love fests, her first this and that, smiles with dada. The sleep…
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Altered Latitude 