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We are MORE
When we got home from the hospital on day one, the 8×10 mirror that had been hanging in our family’s living room for 20 years had fallen off the wall and shattered into a million pieces. Our hearts a reflection of the remnants on the ground. I remember desperately wishing that day for time to […]
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365 Days With My Dad
On the first day you left, I opened a new google doc and titled it: “365 days without my dad”. Every day since then you have proven me wrong. My gaze lingers longer than it should on the butterfly or the hummingbird. Is it you? What are you now? More of a feeling or […]
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Coming of Age
There are so many things that can’t be put into words and so many other things that I wish I never had. Maisley kept asking where Poppi was when we were celebrating his birthday dinner. She asked if he was going to come down from the sky now. I got halfway through my beautiful explanation […]
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September
“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself.” – Paulo Coelho September is chock-full of change – new school year, Football season (eye-roll) and fall on the horizon. Grounded into the newness are lingering summer nights that leave me grasping for the memories and feelings of more carefree days. […]
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One More
One more song with the windows rolled down, One more trip to a bucket list town. One more beer, One more cheers. One more comforting hug, One more full-bodied laugh, One more finance chat. One more piece of advice, One more after-dinner orange slice. One more Bass Lake run, One more game of Yahtzee, anyone? […]
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Hard Days: A Road Map
Overall I’m having more “good” days than “bad” days right now. After a string of good days, the bad ones still catch me off guard. Is it grief? Is it motherhood? Is it an aggro-crag of PMS? Is it just a hard day? My dedicated brain is always trying to understand and find an explanation […]
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Out Of Office
There’s always something specific I daydream about over and over before vacation. Last summer it was sitting under a moon-lit sky eating pizza. This time, it was boogie boarding in the warm water and getting lei’d. (No offense Ryan, but I mean that literally, like the smell and feeling of the cool fragrant flowers around […]
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Borrowed Time
In talking with a friend about her friend’s near death experience, I asked, with a misplaced chip on my shoulder, “I wonder what he plans to do with his borrowed time?” The words left my lips and immediately made a swift u-turn, staring at me blankly in the face. Ah, right. We’re all on borrowed […]
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What I Used to Think
“You can turn over every stone on Earth and still not find what you’re looking for.” I used to think I’d find myself in the color of my hair, or the clothes I’d wear; the number of piercings in my ear. The friends I’d make, the boys I’d kiss, the jobs I’d win, the places […]
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Triggers
I drove to Creative Mornings with mascara on, feeling brave and un-smudgeable. I met my friend and creative dreaming partner, Suzanne, coincidently twinning in a golden shirt, jeans and brown sandals. It was her birthday and the day before Coura’s birthday. I was feeling excited to hear some inspiring words on creativity. Five minutes into […]